YOUR FAMILY SHOULD understand that the menopause is a natural life stage, not an illness, but its diverse physical and emotional symptoms can significantly affect your daily life and relationships. Honest, open and age-appropriate communication, education and lifestyle support can make life easier for everyone involved.
This article was included in issue 108 (Spring 2026) of The Menopause Exchange newsletter.
Before talking to your family about the menopause, take some time to learn about what you’re going through. Choose the right time to talk when everyone is relaxed, such as when you’re all having a walk or an evening at home. You could open the conversation by saying you’ve been reading about the menopause and think you have some of the symptoms. Try to involve the whole family, using simple terms for younger members, focusing on physical and emotional symptoms. With teenagers, explain that the menopause is like “puberty in reverse” to improve their understanding.
Try to give the family ideas about how they might help, such as practical help with household tasks or you may need some quiet time during a hot flush or when you’re feeling overwhelmed. Explain that they need to be patient – mood swings and irritability are common symptoms, not personal attacks. This ideally should be an ongoing conversation, rather than a single chat, so everyone feels involved.
Here is some information that your family should know.
Basic menopause facts
The menopause is when your periods stop permanently, usually between ages 45 and 55. It’s a gradual process marking the end of the reproductive years when your ovaries stop producing eggs each month. The “perimenopause” starts earlier when hormones fluctuate and symptoms begin, including irregular periods that may be heavier or lighter. The “menopause” itself is officially diagnosed after 12 months without a menstrual period.
Common menopausal symptoms
Menopausal symptoms vary from woman to woman. They can be mild or severe and may last for several years. Around 80% of menopausal women experience hot flushes. These cause a sudden, intense feeling of heat spreading over your body, especially your face, neck and chest, often accompanied by sweating, red skin, heart palpitations and anxiety. This can last from a few seconds to five minutes and may leave you feeling chilled as your body cools down.
Hot flushes are caused by declining oestrogen levels. They’re often worse at night, during the summer and when triggered by stress, spicy foods, caffeine, alcohol, hot drinks, smoking or tight clothing. They often worsen during the perimenopause (mid-40s to 50s), peaking around the time of your last period (average age 51) and may continue for several years. The most intense symptoms are during the first 1 to 2 years after your periods stop, although some women experience them for much longer. Hot flushes in younger women (under 40) may be longer-lasting, with more severe experiences, while older women (over 50) tend to have hot flushes and sweats for a shorter time.
Other menopausal symptoms include anxiety, low mood, irritability, brain fog, poor concentration, joint pain and sleep issues. A lack of sleep, including insomnia and wakefulness during the night, can make these symptoms worse. The menopause reduces levels of collagen, oil (sebum) and hyaluronic acid, leading to thinner, less resilient, itchy and flaky skin that loses moisture easily. Falling levels of oestrogen makes the body’s tissues thinner, drier and less elastic, leading to itching, soreness, urinary frequency and urgency and recurrent urinary tract infections.
Weight gain is common at this time of life as your metabolism slows down, with a loss of muscle, shifting fat storage to your tummy area and increasing health risks. After the menopause, lower oestrogen levels can increase the risk of long-term health conditions such as osteoporosis (weak bones) and heart disease.
Managing the menopause
Coping with the menopause involves lifestyle changes, such as eating a healthy diet containing plenty of calcium and vitamin D, maintaining a normal weight, taking regular exercise, stress reduction (yoga, mindfulness etc.), wearing light layers and avoiding triggers such as caffeine, spicy foods, alcohol and smoking. To manage dry, itchy skin, use gentle non-foaming cleansers, moisturise twice a day with products containing ceramides or glycerine, and take shorter lukewarm showers.
Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT), such as tablets, gels, patches and a spray, is effective for hot flushes, night sweats, mood swings, brain fog, joint pain and low libido. It reduces the risk of osteoporosis, helping to maintain bone density, and may lower the risk of heart disease and type 2 diabetes. HRT also has a positive effect on skin, joints, mucous membranes and urinary symptoms.
Combined HRT containing oestrogen and progestogen (needed to protect the lining of the uterus (womb)) slightly increases breast cancer risk, especially with longer use, but the risk falls after you stop using it. Oestrogen-only HRT (for women without a uterus) poses little to no increased risk. HRT tablets raise the risk of deep vein thrombosis (blood clots), but this risk is very low, and there’s no increased risk with patches, gels or the spray. Other side effects of HRT are usually mild, including headaches, breast tenderness, bloating, mood changes or unexpected bleeding.
Non-hormonal prescription medicines, including antidepressants, clonidine and oxybutynin, help to reduce flushes and sweats. Fezolinetant and elinzanetant are new, non-hormonal prescription drugs approved to treat moderate to severe hot flushes by targeting the brain’s temperature regulating centre.
By approaching the menopause with empathy and a willingness to learn, you and your family can navigate this natural life transition together.
About the author
Dr Diana Mansour is a consultant in community gynaecology and reproductive healthcare and a clinical appraiser for Newcastle Hospitals. She also works privately for St Erme Medical.
Created 2026
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